Flash Fiction

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‘I’m in a blue t-shirt.’

She looked up from her phone and scoured the room, spotting him perched at a table. He looked even better in person. She walked towards him, her stomach doing somersaults.

Five hours flew by.

(c) Sanch V @ Sanch Writes (2 Jan 2019)

Featured image: Pexels

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  • Kalpana Solsi
    3 January 2019 at 3:54 am

    five hours flew by without looking at the phone. this is love.

  • Christine
    3 January 2019 at 8:15 am

    I like the way we are able to intuit what those five hours were like just from the way you set this up. Nicely done.
    Christine recently posted…New Theme: Twenty NineteenMy Profile

  • Belinda Bekkers
    3 January 2019 at 9:11 am

    Enjoyed reading this, Sanch. The set up was great and the ending gives us a hint of where it’s going. Well done.

  • R.J. Midgley
    3 January 2019 at 11:32 am

    You captured so many different emotions in so few words. You conveyed the feeling of nervous energy particularly well. Great job!
    R.J. Midgley recently posted…A Child is BornMy Profile

  • Melony
    3 January 2019 at 6:23 pm

    Ohhhh! I loved this. It was so sweet. You captured the scene perfectly!

  • Katie
    4 January 2019 at 11:17 am

    I enjoyed the strong word choices of “scoured” and “perched”, how they give a description as well as an action. I wonder if ‘walked’ could also have been a different verb?
    Nice piece!

    • Sanch @ Sanch Writes
      5 January 2019 at 4:23 pm

      Oh thanks! I like that idea; will keep it in mind for any future pieces

  • Jolan Marchese
    4 January 2019 at 11:33 am

    You provided a vivid picture with a small story. Nicely done!

  • Shalzmojo
    5 January 2019 at 5:24 pm

    Saying more with less – wow!!! You aced it Sanch. I have a whole story in my head with just these lines!

  • Obsessivemom
    7 January 2019 at 3:18 pm

    I liked how you did that – that pause before the last line – great use of paragraphing to indicate passage of time.