9 years later


A week ago I caught up with a friend, N from school. It’s been 9 years. The last time we met was on my birthday in 2005. My 21st birthday. Couple of weeks after that, I came Down Under. She, on the other hand, moved to USA later the same year. Hence the 9 year gap in meeting one another. When I went back to India in 2009 and then 2011, she was in the US. So a month ago, when she emailed me to let me know she was coming to Australia with a couple of her friends and spending a couple of days in Sydney, I was excited.

She rang me after landing here on Saturday. I think we were both surprised at how the other sounded. She was surprised at my Aussie accent and I was surprised by her American twang. And then, when we met the next day, on the one hand, it felt like we hadn’t seen each other for ages and yet, on the other hand, it was like we’d always been in touch. To be fair, she is one of the few people who followed my blog pretty much since the beginning and she dabbled with blogging on an on-and-off basis as well. So in a way, we’ve been updated on each other’s lives.

Apart from the fact that we have known each other since we were 9 years old, our dads have been friends since a young age too. We shared a love for books while growing up. But to be perfectly honest, I don’t think we were all that close through our school days. Blame it on different personalities {her being a lot more confident and extroverted and me being a bit introverted but stubborn} or my mum constantly comparing me to her {she always stood first in class!} But I think post-Year 10 when we went down different paths — she into engineering and me into the humanities — I think it helped the relationship. My mum could no longer compare me to her which in turn, meant I didn’t have to see her as a rival of sorts. Slight digression: Why do parents do that? Don’t they realise it negatively impacts the individual as well as relationships?

There are currently a few things that bond N and I together — neither of us wants to ever go back to India and feel a deep sense of affinity for our chosen countries {mine has been even before I set foot in Aus but for N, it’s developed in the past 9 years}, we are the only two from our school year who remain unmarried {as neither of us wants an arranged marriage!}, a love for hiking and the outdoors {she climbed Mount Kilimanjaro last year!} and we are independent, successful women in our own rights.

It feels wonderful to have a relationship with someone where despite a physical gap, you still connect. There are very few friends I continue to have that with. N would be one of them. Where you begin to catch up where you left off. Where it feels like you spoke just yesterday. And not 9 years ago! Where you have grown together in different parts of the world. And where you are proud of the person they are and are genuinely happy for all they have achieved.

So although it’s been 9 years, it feels like just yesterday.

I’m so glad we got to meet again N. The next time hopefully, it will be in California. Or Canada. Just as we discussed!

Do you have connections like this? That seem to be strong in spite of no physical or telephone contact for years?

Do share!Β 

***Linking up with Jess for IBOT***

Until next time,


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  • Eloquent Mind
    25 February 2014 at 12:56 pm

    Doesn’t it feel wonderful when we catch up with friends we have lost contact with years before only to pick up from where we left? πŸ™‚ My class-mate and best friend, J, stays in Abu Dhabi and we have been in touch on and off over the past 13 years. And yet when we meet it’s like we never stayed apart.

    Nice post PB ! πŸ˜‰
    Eloquent Mind recently posted…Guest Post By Sage HarmanMy Profile

    • Psych Babbler
      25 February 2014 at 8:34 pm

      It certainly does…I feel so fortunate that I have about 4 friends who are like that. Where it feels like the distance means nothing. It’s an amazing feeling and glad you have someone like that too EM! πŸ™‚

  • R's Mom
    25 February 2014 at 1:36 pm

    Oh thats so so wonderful to connect with a friend after so many years πŸ™‚
    R’s Mom recently posted…Conversations in the R HouseholdMy Profile

    • Psych Babbler
      25 February 2014 at 8:35 pm

      It was great RM! πŸ™‚

  • Lisa Barton-Collins
    25 February 2014 at 3:53 pm

    You are so lucky to have a friend that close, even though you haven’t seen each other in so long. True Friendship indeed!
    Lisa Barton-Collins recently posted…Uncovering the Brisbane LookMy Profile

    • Psych Babbler
      25 February 2014 at 8:35 pm

      It’s funny Lisa but I think the distance and growing up more has made us understand each other so much more…life has its way of teaching us things! πŸ™‚

  • Rach
    25 February 2014 at 5:35 pm

    there are few things as wonderful when it seems like time hasn’t passed at all in a friendshipxx
    Rach recently posted…Why Can’t We Be FriendsMy Profile

    • Psych Babbler
      25 February 2014 at 8:36 pm

      Welcome here Rach…and yes, few things are as wonderful in life! πŸ™‚

  • Mi
    25 February 2014 at 5:40 pm

    That was such a nice post… πŸ™‚ Good you both had such a nice time.. Some friendships are just so great.. you don’t have to do just grows with time and turns into something so wonderful, that it surprises you time and again! πŸ™‚

    i haven’t been away from any of my friends for more than 5 years, but I know what a reunion after 9 years would feel like! πŸ™‚
    Mi recently posted…25 things that I seriously want to give upMy Profile

    • Psych Babbler
      25 February 2014 at 8:38 pm

      Reunions with people who matter are wonderful… πŸ™‚ I have 4 friends who I feel the similar connection with…like we’ve never been apart.

  • Tat
    25 February 2014 at 7:31 pm

    I’ve lived in Australia for 14 years now, and still my best friends remain the ones back home, even though I’m really bad at keeping in touch. Great that you got to catch up with your friend, I know exactly how it feels!
    Tat recently posted…Getting the kids out of the house is as easy as riding a bikeMy Profile

    • Psych Babbler
      25 February 2014 at 8:39 pm

      Oh I hear you Tat…I can be pretty slack when it comes to keeping in touch…life gets in the way I suppose. But yeah, there are some people who you can meet after yonks and yet, it feels like you’ve been together all this time! πŸ™‚

  • Emily @ Have A Laugh On Me
    25 February 2014 at 7:41 pm

    Firstly – I LOVE your new look, and if you tell me you did it yourself I’m going to collapse on the floor in a heap and cry!!!!!!!!
    Secondly, yes I have a BFF that I went to boarding school with at 12 years of age, we speak maybe 4 times a year but we will always be soul sisters.
    Lovely post xx
    Emily @ Have A Laugh On Me recently posted…Trust me – once you go big you’ll never go back!My Profile

    • Psych Babbler
      25 February 2014 at 8:43 pm

      Thanks for the comment about the look of the blog Em…I did do it myself. But before you collapse hear me out — it wasn’t all that hard. Sure it took me 3 hours on a Saturday night but I used Canva for my header and used the WP 2012 theme {Deux Milluex Douze to be exact} and customised the colours and fonts — it was super-easy to customise. Didn’t have to get into the codes except to change colours for the sidebar widget banners and the date banner.

      Ooh you went to boarding school — sounds like so much fun and blog fodder! πŸ™‚ And it’s incredible to have that kind of relationship, isn’t it? πŸ™‚

  • Zita
    25 February 2014 at 9:08 pm

    I love those friendships… No matter how long it’s been it feels like yesterday… That’s true friendship I think! I have a friend in Canada and we also talk about meeting half way somewhere sometime but so far haven’t done it… Probably should make an effort to change that!
    Zita recently posted…to stop the hurting..My Profile

  • Titaxy
    26 February 2014 at 1:24 am

    isn’t that wonderful. these sort of long lasting friendships are amazing – feeling like you haven’t lost touch, not feeling that long distance gap, etc. i have one friend who i met after almost 10 years last time i went to india and it was awesome to catch up, even though it felt like we never lost touch.
    Titaxy recently posted…RainbowMy Profile

  • Pixie
    26 February 2014 at 4:18 am

    wow!! How wonderful! πŸ™‚
    So nice to know you 2 were able to reconnect after so many years! πŸ™‚

  • Avada Kedavra
    26 February 2014 at 5:55 am

    Recently I met one of my friends after a gap for 7 yrs or so and it felt it we were never apart. Some friendships are really special that way πŸ™‚
    Avada Kedavra recently posted…A Song of Ice and FireMy Profile

  • Annaleis
    26 February 2014 at 12:01 pm

    I just went to Melbourne for a holidays with girls I went to Primary school with. One I hadn’t seen for 15 years. It was fantastic and I love that the internet allows us to keep in touch with friends that we chose.
    Annaleis recently posted…{WW} February at the FarmMy Profile

  • Deb @ Home life simplified
    26 February 2014 at 9:20 pm

    that is so wonderful. i have been overseas for almost 20 years (15 in australia) and i have wonderful friends back home in the states that i can see every 3-6 years and it is as natural as can be
    Deb @ Home life simplified recently posted…3 Ways to Cultivate More Joy in your LifeMy Profile

  • Jyotsna Bhatia
    28 February 2014 at 12:18 am

    What a warm post you have here. Loved reading about your friendship. I have a soul sister too, far away in America. But yes, we are in touch on the phone. But I guess, being in touch or not, there are some people who touch our hearts in a way that nobody else can and no matter how long we are away from them, they always remain special.
    Jyotsna Bhatia recently posted…That wasn’t what I meant – 33 wordsMy Profile

  • iSophie
    1 March 2014 at 6:33 am

    Sounds like you are both so similar, and have had such a long history. I have a friend like that, though prob not as close. We only speak once in a while but know that we are always there for each other if needed. Some times people just ‘get’ you and that makes it just so much easier. #teamIBOT