Shame Attack!

When I did a cognitive-behavioural therapy workshop last year, one of the things we had to do was a “shame-attack” task. Basically it involved doing something you think is embarrassing and evaluate how it goes. I had gone to a nice restaurant and had dinner by myself on a Friday night. The aim of the exercise is almost to show that either people don’t care about you to pay attention, and even if they do, you survive something you think is embarrassing (because in our heads, something embarrassing equals something so catastrophic).

Anyway, the reason I am telling you this…

I had an impromptu shame-attack exercise an hour ago.

I was returning home from work and stopped at the local bottle-shop to buy a couple of bottles of red wine. Anyway, found my two bottles of McGuigan’s Merlot and took it up to the counter.

Paid for it.

The girl put it in the paper bag.

I picked up the paper bag.



Some paper from top of the paper bag was all that was left in my hand. Everything else on the floor. Red wine leaking flowing out of two broken glass bottles.

And all eyes on me.

You know that feeling where you wish you could rewind the last few seconds? I had it then.

But the two girls at the counter were really nice about it. They said it happens all the time. I just kept apologising over and over and over…

They said I could go back and get two more bottles and didn’t have to pay for it. (Which surprised me…considering I did break the bottles!)

I guess it could have been worse. It could have been a bottle-o that was as crowded as a supermarket.

In the end, as embarrassing as it was, I survived it.

Now just to see if I can face them again!

Until next time,


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  • PNA
    30 April 2010 at 9:39 am

    mmmmmmmmm………….. u know what, I once went into Archies Gallery and was looking around when I spotted this cute yellow little teddy bear or monkey but it was irrestitable and I suddenly I picked it up and them there was that alaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarm…….. wowo… I was stunned for a momemt and then I started to laugh and all laughed along with me.. we moved to another part of the shop was there quite for a long time and the alaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarming sound of the yellow stuffed toy rang almost so many times, but I failed to record the reactions of others because I was far away, but we did smile to ourselves as we were there in those pair of shoes too:)

  • BlueMist
    30 April 2010 at 9:49 am

    LOL I think you will do fine. Something similar happened with me in super market. They had arranged shelf full wine bottles and while moving around the trolley touched the bottle in the extreme corner of the shelf. It was a mess but thankfully nobody reacted or even asked me to pay for that.

  • bookslifenmore
    30 April 2010 at 9:50 am

    lol!! If I start feling embarrased for a situation like this I would stop going out 😀 Chill!! Hota hai 🙂

  • celestialrays
    30 April 2010 at 1:34 pm

    Ohh! Don’t worry PB, I think you will be fine the next time around… Who knows, prolly you’ll make good friends with the staff 😀

  • Titaxy
    30 April 2010 at 1:53 pm

    Oh that’s bad. But glad you got thru it 🙂 It happens…

    And hey, this whole shame-attack thing sounds interesting. I have many many things I won’t ever do because I think it will embarrass me and stuff. Need to try something like this 🙂

  • arundhati
    30 April 2010 at 5:16 pm

    I dropped a beauutiful clay pot – Native American, handmade… and it shattered to pieces. I was more guilty than embarrassed, at having broken something so lovely

  • bluntedges
    30 April 2010 at 5:58 pm

    LOL…so did u pick up 2 more bottles after that?

  • keerthana
    2 May 2010 at 9:59 am

    I’m a veteran in this, best to just let it go!

  • journomuse
    2 May 2010 at 11:02 am

    How about when you are in a supermarket and your 5’3″ tall body refuses to stretch a bit more to get that box of cereal from the top shelf, but you refuse to settle for any other brand and there aren’t any nice helpful looking guys taller than you around? So you keep inching it with your index finger and then suddenly the avalanche of cereal boxes land on you, knocking you into the aisle and there are about 20 cartons all around you and you are with your legs splayed in the most inelegant fashion making a warm spectacle of yourself…well…im yet to live that embarrassment i chose another brand if mine is placed on shelves higher up…now..didn’t that make you feel a tad better?

  • Psych Babbler
    2 May 2010 at 11:16 am

    LOL!! Welcome Journomuse and thanks heaps for sharing! Yes it did make me feel a tad better! =P But I can feel your pain!!

  • Psych Babbler
    2 May 2010 at 9:20 pm

    Welcome Keerthana! And given you speak from experience, I will let it go =P Keep visiting!

  • Psych Babbler
    2 May 2010 at 9:21 pm

    Of course I did! And didn’t have to pay for those. =D If I thought I needed wine before, I needed it a lot more after the incident! =P

  • Psych Babbler
    2 May 2010 at 9:21 pm

    Ouch! Yeah I guess mine wasn’t lovely…just blood red…

  • Psych Babbler
    2 May 2010 at 9:27 pm

    Hehe…I guess it does. You should try some shame attack tasks…even if you start with something small. You know, the psychologist that came up with this did several himself, one of which was he took a stuffed teddy bear and went to a posh restaurant in the US and had dinner with the bear including a conversation with the bear and ordering for the bear! I really doubt I could do that. Unless I guess I was never going to show my face in that place ever again… =P

  • Psych Babbler
    3 May 2010 at 8:37 am

    Hehe…maybe they will give me discounts next time! 😉

  • Psych Babbler
    3 May 2010 at 8:37 am

    Lol! I actually thought of you after the incident…how you write brilliantly about embarrassing moments! =)

  • Psych Babbler
    3 May 2010 at 8:40 am

    Ah….good to know someone else had a wine episode! Hehe…I think though I would have died if I had broken a whole shelf….just me…that’s shame attack to the nth degree…

  • Psych Babbler
    3 May 2010 at 8:41 am

    Hahaha! Y’know, a friend of mine did something similar once…we were at a technology store and she lifted one of the mobile phones on display but managed to pull it out of it’s socket thingy and the alarm went off…took a while for a staff to stop it because he couldn’t find his keys… =P I moved away from my friend for a while…not a good friend I am 😉

  • Rads
    28 July 2010 at 6:11 pm

    Been there done that 🙂 Actually i remember once when i was picking up a big bottle of wine at the local store (back when I was living in the US), the fellow there used to just put it in a thin paper bag and just hand it out to me. Since the bag was flimsy I had to hold it either with both hands or had to literally hug the bottle to keep it from falling ( these were the bigger than normal sizes).
    Once I promptly dropped it after paying for it and casually told him that it would be nice to actually get a bag that can hold the bottle. Believe me after that incident, dunno about the others, but I always got a double bag for all my bottles 🙂

  • Psych Babbler
    1 August 2010 at 10:23 am

    Lol!! Glad to know others who have done exactly that!!! 😀